$20 Cake, Big Shoes and Breakin' Shit

Day before mother's day.

I knew she loves cakes, so I thought to get her one of those ice cream cakes from Baskin Robins. A normal size cake of this kind, $30!!! So, I bought her the half size cake for $20, it was only about 6" across and 6" tall. I took at home and showed my dad and he agreed, $20, ripoff! BUT I knew she loved it so whatever.

So I go upstairs after hiding the cake, to grab something before I head off to buy the 2nd part of her gift, and my mom's at the top of the stairs. "No!" she whines.

"What?" I say, raising an eyebrow in confusion.

"Those shoes? With that? I bought you shoes, wear those ones."

"I just spent $20 on a fucking cake for you SHUT UP!" I wanted to say. But instead I said, "Don't worry about my shoes. Who cares?"

"Everyone that says your big clod hopper shoes will care."

As the argument ensues, my dad comes upstairs to watch and laugh and to encourage my mom to shut up.

"Please just change your shoes!" says my mom exasperated.

"Please stop caring," I snap back.

"Yeah seriously who cares," said my dad.

"I'm leaving! Goodbye!" I turn to walk down the stairs with my 'big ass shoes' when I hear my mom at the top of the stairs...

"Da derp dee derp da derp dee derp," in a song song voice with every step I take landing on a 'derp.' I sigh loudly as she laughs and I leave, trying not to slam the door behind me.

I go to the store and find this cute bear statue that's standing on his back feet, his stomach all pudge and his big black eyes all adorable as he holds his hands up to hold a tray. It's the last one, and my mom would love it.

I pick it up to look at it's face when his paws along with the tray slip off and shatter on the floor. Other customers turn to stare at me, I stare at the bear in surprise, feeling their gazes burning into me.

Apparently some ASSHOLE had already broken the fucking bear and just set his paws and tray balancing precariously on the jagged pieces of the top of his head and arms. I picked up would I could to take it to customer service.

After i drive to another store to find the same bear and very carefully put it in my car, I decide to do some retail therapy. For those of you who know me, I do not randomly splurge money on myself, but I was like fuck it. So I go to the store and as I'm trying on some new shorts, I get a text from my mom. I thought the family bbq had started at 4. I forgot the day before she'd changed it to 2 but I didn't change it in my calendar on my phone. It was 2:45. Everyone was wondering where I was. Cursing, I abandon the new shorts and rush to the bbq.

What a fucking day.